I want it and I want it NOW!

I left for work yesterday just before 5:30am and got home just after 4pm with plans of making either pancakes or waffles for dinner. Both were nice and easy and both could be used for a quick lunch for son today. I checked the fridge as soon as I walked in and we had just enough milk left. Of course, a half hour later when I went to make the pancakes, son had already drank over a cup and we no longer had enough.

I grumbled and we headed out to the grocery store to pick up milk and something for dinner as by that time I didn't really feel like making pancakes. We headed down the dairy aisle first then son started down the ice cream aisle. We looked at the huge row of tantalizing confections and son burst out, "It's not fair. I can't get ice cream because of your stupid diet". I assured him we could go back to the dairy aisle and pick up cream then he retaliated with, "No! Then we'd have to wait until tomorrow and I don't want to have to wait. I want ice cream now!"

At the time I simply empathized with him. It wasn't fair. Why does our food have so much stuff in it? I'm not talking about added vitamins and minerals. I'm talking about edible fillers used so our food is almost the same as the original but cheaper to produce. High fructose corn syrup instead of plain sugar. Cellulose gum in cartons of 35% whipping cream. And I said to him, "What does it do to our bodies when so much of our food has fillers added so they can be made more cheaply? Things that are edible but taking the place of food with real nutritional value. Why can't we buy a carton of ice cream at the store that has nothing but cream, eggs, sugar, milk, and vanilla? Why can't I buy a simple carton of whipping cream that has an ingredient list comprised of cream?" Or more specifically why can't I buy a 500mL carton for under $9 when the rest of the cartons are $3.99?

This morning I thought back to one day last week. It was a hot sunny day and I knew I had an hour ahead of me, after work, before I got home. This includes a walk around a city block through downtown to transfer from one bus to another (thanks darn one-way streets). But I'd made two different batches of ice cream the night before and was looking forward to having a bowl after dinner. I couldn't wait to open the freezer and pick my ice cream. That's when I realized we're missing out on one other crucial ingredient these days. Anticipation.

My Mom commented once about credit cards and layaway. That up until the 1950's, people simply didn't have credit cards. If you wanted something, you saved up your money until you could afford it then bought it. If there was something you wanted desperately, like an engagement ring, and were worried it would be gone ahead of time then you put it on layaway and made payments towards it until you'd paid it off. But you didn't get it until you'd made your final payment.

These days there's no waiting. If you want something, go out today and get it. From the little things like a bowl of ice cream to the big things like furniture. We live in the NOW. Not mindfully, not the Buddhist tradition of "living in the now", but like toddlers who can't wait for their cookie. "I want it and I want it now", versus "I will not fret about the past or worry overmuch about the future, instead I'll savour today and live life for this moment".

That afternoon, while I pondered my ice cream, felt a little like Christmas. Something good was going to happen when I got home. Something tasty. Something I liked. And I couldn't rush it. It was going to happen in it's own time.

These days anticipation happens less and less frequently. It doesn't matter what we want (especially in urban areas) we can get it right away. Our grocery store is open 24 hours a day and so is our drug store. At least one of the local fast food outlets is open about 22 hours a day and several more for the full 24 hours. If you want burgers at 2am, they're good with it. If I want to watch a TV show, on demand television brings it to my living room any time I want. If I want to read a book, I can buy it and instantly download it to my ereader this second.

Each one individually isn't a bad thing. I love being able to pick out a book to read at bedtime. And when we moved in here and were still unloading the moving truck at 11pm, it was great to be able to run to the store for cold drinks and food. But as all these conveniences move into our lives, we experience anticipation less and less. I could run across the street and buy a loaf of bread right now. I could go a few more blocks to an actual bakery and pick up a loaf of fresh bread. But we'd miss out on the aroma of fresh bread permeating the apartment for the last hour before the bread was done. We'd miss out on that first slice, the one where the bread is finally cool enough to cut but still warm enough to melt butter.

And that's what I want for my kids. Eat an apple, have a piece of cheese, but otherwise you have to wait because Mom's making real food for dinner. Anticipate. It's good for you.

A Thousand Little Lies

I moved in with my fiance in my early 20's. Until then I'd lived at home with my family. My Mom had struggled with weight issues for most of her life and worried about me. I felt like everything I ate was watched and measured, that if I ate just a little less... weighed just a little less, I'd be so much better. I found it overwhelming and was relieved to discover my fiance simply did not care what I ate. Tub of chocolate frosting for dinner? Go for it. It took me years to realize that not caring was not a good thing.

The novelty of eating a tub of frosting wore off pretty quickly and I soon began pouring though easy recipes. I'd become a vegetarian in college and was basically learning how to cook from scratch. I grew up in a home where meat was the centre of the meal and veggies were an afterthought, boiled and placed on the side of the plate. I've always been interesting in cooking healthy food and soon worked out several recipes we enjoyed. Nevertheless I slowly grew fat under the weight of a thousand little lies.

It's easy to lie to yourself. Easy to let things slip past. I'm young, I don't need exercise. I'm busy chasing after the little ones all day, that's enough exercise. I deserve a treat after the day I had (totally ignoring the fact I'd already had several "treats" that day). I'll exercise tomorrow. Sure I've gained weight but it doesn't show. It's just PMS weight, it'll be gone soon. A life without chocolate isn't worth living. Maybe my life will be shorter but it'll be a good life with food I love and enjoy.

My favourite treat was milk chocolate. I'd buy a bag of milk chocolate chips to mix into brownies. Then I'd have a little bowl as a treat... and another... and another. Within a day or so I'd need to buy a new bag so I could make brownies. Days later, when I finally made a pan of brownies, I'd have to buy yet another bag. But the brownie mix made two batches and, while I only needed half a bag of chips per batch, I'd usually snacked enough that I needed another bag in order to make the second batch. And so on.

My daughter commented once that brownies weren't a treat when we had them all the time. At the time I was annoyed because I still felt they were my treat but she was right. A treat is supposed to be something special and out of the ordinary. I was making two batches of brownies every single week. And eating other treats besides.

Then came more lies. It's just that one pair of pants that don't fit. Elastic waistbands are more comfortable anyways. That photo was simply taken at an awkward angle (same with that photo and this one). If I stand at this exact angle with my head tilted just so, I look fine.

There's only so long I could blame the camera and/or crop photos so that all of me wasn't in the shot before admitting it wasn't the camera, it was me.

Now I'm working at telling myself the truth. The more exercise I do, the better healthy food tastes. I crave junk food less when I take care of myself more. There is time every day to exercise. We all have 24 hours and it's not hard to squeeze in 15 minutes to a half hour. Cooking a pot of rice, lentils, garlic, and herbs while tossing a salad takes just as little time than popping a frozen pizza into the oven and is infinitely more satisfying. If you have 15 minutes, you have time to cook a healthy meal. If you routinely don't have 15 minutes, you need to organize your time better.

The one I'm struggling with right now is exercise. Now that I've moved, I need to leave for work just over an hour in advance. I start as early as 6:30am and, when I'm up at 4:30am and walking out the door just before 5:30am, it's hard to get up a half hour earlier to exercise. And it's equally as hard to come home and exercise after working on my feet all day. Plus I need to be in bed around 8:30pm those nights, leaving little time to work out after dinner. This week, however, I start at 7:30am every morning. I'm hoping that a solid week of daily workouts will help get me into a routine of regular exercise again.

As for today, I've been out for a walk, exercised with the Wii My Fitness Coach, and am heading downstairs for a half-hour on the treadmill before dinner. No more lies, no more excuses. It's time to shape my life and be the me I want to be.

Decadent, delicious low-fat frozen chocolate yogourt

I think the title pretty much says it all. I'd been looking for a yummy chocolate treat that wasn't too rich but still tasted good. Something that warranted the word "treat". And I found it here. Unfortunately the recipe calls for low-fat evaporated milk and I couldn't find a can that wasn't processed (mmm... dipotassium phosphate). But one of the comments had alternate instructions and they were even yummier than the original.

Home-made frozen chocolate yogourt

1 can low-fat sweetened condensed milk
1/2 cup dark chocolate (either chips or a broken chocolate bar)
3 tbsp cocoa powder
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup fat free plain Greek yogourt

Stir chocolate chips and condensed milk in a sauce pan over medium heat until chips are melted and blended in with the milk. Remove from heat and add cocoa and vanilla. Stir until blended then mix in yogourt. Cool.

At this point I spoon it into my ice cream machine (it's very thick) and let it mix for about an hour before putting it in the freezer. If you don't have an ice cream machine, just put it in the freezer immediately and remove to stir about every 10 to 15 minutes for the first hour. I find it needs to freeze for about 24 hours before it's thick enough so make it a day in advance.

If you're making this for a family, you might want to double it as it only makes about two or three bowls. I make this and plain vanilla ice cream so the kids have some choice with their treat (I will post that recipe tomorrow). Enjoy!

Recipes

I've had a few people ask me for recipes in the past week and decided to share some here. The hard part is I don't always use a recipe. I smell spices to see which ones would work the best in a recipe and just chuck in a pinch or two. I'll add a slosh of cooking wine and a handful or two of veggies. This makes it hard to write a recipe down. But I'll try my best.

The first one is easiest as it's my Mom's banana bread recipe, just slightly modified to make banana muffins. These are yummy and make a great breakfast or snack.

Banana-Pecan Muffins

1 3/4 cups whole wheat flour (I use PC Organic)
1/4 cup ground flax seeds
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup sugar
1/3 cup butter (or low fat Greek yogourt)
1 egg (or equivalent amount of egg whites)
2 or 3 mashed bananas
1 lemon (grated peel and juice)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 cup chopped pecans

1) Preheat oven to 350F and grease 12 cup muffin tin.

2) Grate lemon and squeeze juice into a small bowl then mash banana with juice and peel. Add vanilla and set aside.

3) Blend flour, ground flax, baking powder, salt, and baking soda.

4) Cream sugar, butter, and egg well.

5) Add dry ingredients alternately to creamed mixture with mashed bananas. Blend well after each addition. Stir in pecans.

6) Scoop a quarter cup of batter into each muffin tin. Bake about 22 minutes and cool on rack.

Simple White Sauce

2 tbsps whole wheat flour
2 tbsps butter
1 cup milk

Melt butter in a pot and add flour. Stir until combined then pour in one cup of milk. Stir continuously until mixture thickens and begins to boil. Remove from heat.

The nice thing about the white sauce recipe is it's very versatile.  Grate some cheese into it and mix with noodles and you have macaroni and cheese. Today I used it as a base for vegetable gravy.

Roasted Garlic

1 bulb garlic
oil to drizzle

Preheat oven to 400F. Rub some of the paper off a bulb of garlic then slice the top off, just deep enough that all the cloves have the tip cut off. Drizzle the bulb with oil and wrap in foil. Place on a pan or cooking sheet (unless you want oil dripping on your oven floor) and bake for a half hour. Remove (carefully) from foil and cool.

I made poutine for dinner tonight. I used the white sauce as a gravy then mashed a bulb of roasted garlic with some cooking wine and added that to the white sauce with some snips of fresh dill and some freshly ground black pepper. Homemade fries are dead easy. Just chop potatoes into whatever size fries you want, keeping in mind the thicker they are the longer it'll take to cook them, and rinse them in cold water. Pat dry with a towel and drizzle with oil. Then cook at 400F for 40 minutes (for medium cut fries), turning once at the halfway mark. I used white cheese curds as they didn't have any colour added. They turned out really yummy and the sauce would have been just as good as a topping for rice. Or even with some freshly shaved Parmesan over fettuccine noodles.

Bonne appetit!

The yummiest diet ever

I've been on an "eating from scratch using minimally processed foods with no additives or preservatives" diet for just over a week now. I have no real idea how the diet's going since there hasn't been enough time to judge. I've lost a pound but a single pound is easily lost and gained. However, this is the yummiest diet I've ever been on. I baked banana nut muffins this evening. Organic whole wheat flour, butter, organic bananas, grated and squeezed lemon, real vanilla, and pecans. I ate one a few minutes ago and it nearly melted in my mouth.

Cooking from scratch has been interesting. I have spent most of my adult life cooking meals and come from a family which cooks. So I was surprised to realize how much we do use prepared foods. From bouillon cubes to prepared salad dressing to family dishes that use powdered mixes or canned cream soups for bases... switching to this diet has meant overhauling my kitchen (made easier by letting my kitchen go almost bare for the move) and rethinking a lot of recipes and supplies.

There have been some mistakes. I baked muffins last week and substituted natural peanut butter for the butter, thinking peanut butter banana muffins would be yummy. The peanut butter was too thick and I ended up with peanut butter banana bricks. Then there was the vegetarian gravy recipe I made for poutine, with 2 tbsps of cornstarch. It was more like a savoury vegetarian jell-o. But the successes have majorly outnumbered the mistakes.

My son was so worried when I told him about this new diet. What was he going to eat? No more ice cream from the store? No more pizza pockets? No buying a couple of boxes of Kraft dinner? Those fears dissipated with the first batch of homemade ice cream and totally evaporated with the homemade macaroni and cheese. He just came over here now after squeezing his own apple juice with a garlic press. It was a tad lumpy but he was thrilled with it. "Look Mom, I made apple juice from scratch and it tastes really good!"

On top of the healthy eating, we have so many more options here, exercise wise. I've discovered a trail that starts a block from my home and runs right downtown, as well as a nearby conservation area. This evening I went downstairs to the gym and used the elliptical for a half hour then swam laps for 20 minutes. Tomorrow I think I'll try out the treadmill.

As for now, I think I'll go clean the garlic press.

We're here!!!

The move was hellish, which I think pretty much describes all moves. Our truck came an hour and a half late, or just in time considering the people moving out ahead of us were also an hour and a half late, and they sent the wrong sized truck and had to make two trips. Our last box came inside just before midnight and I woke early the next morning to boxes everywhere. Mazes of boxes and three confused cats wandering around crying. I also woke in a panic because we left both our bikes back at the old apartment. Luckily we hadn't turned in our keys yet (funnily enough management wasn't around at that time of night to accept them) so we grabbed the bikes on our way to drop off the keys.

Now the boxes are almost empty, all that's left is putting up the decorations and taking 200 photos to share with friends and family. Then I can finally relax and enjoy the last couple of days of my vacation before heading back to work.

When I was a child I loved vacations where we stayed in a hotel with a pool. To me it seemed unspeakably fancy to be able to just leave your room and go downstairs to swim. That's how I felt on Friday when we went downstairs to use the pool for the first time. It was miserable outside; cold, rainy and windy. But there we were, towels and bathing suits slung over our arms as we headed to the pool. It was wonderful splashing around, knowing our home was just an elevator away. This was when my son piped up and said "Mom, this feels so fancy" and I realized he knew just how I felt. The gym is right beside the pool and I noticed there's an elliptical and an exercise bike as well as a treadmill. I can go downstairs to work out then cool off in the pool.

Yesterday we went out grocery shopping for the first time since deciding to eat all natural foods. It was interesting. I couldn't get over how many additives there are in everything. Even things like flour, whipping cream, and cream cheese. But we managed to find everything we needed and lug it all home. Today I'm making soup stock, bread, and ice cream.

And now I'm using the Wii My Fitness Coach for the first time in a month!

What am I eating?

Last week I bought myself a frozen raspberry lemonade. It tasted good; a sweet, lemony slushie. But as I sipped it, I wondered what on earth I was drinking. The raspberry flavour was completely artificial while the lemon had "lemon flavouring" (along with other unspecified natural flavours and a host of other ingredients). The slushie mixture was made of water and a sugar syrup with even more ingredients. I thought how much better that lemonade would have been with real raspberries, lemon juice, a bit of sugar, and ice.

A few days later I got my daughter a can of iced tea. The front of the can bragged about how it's made from "the best stuff on earth" with real tea and natural flavours. As we were walking along, she turned the can around and started reading the ingredients.

"Sodium hexametaphosphate?" she read with some confusion. "I know sodium is salt but what is hexametaphosphate?"

I had to admit I had no idea. Google has subsequently informed me it's used primarily in laboratories, detergents, paints, and photography applications to keep particles from clumping or settling. Why is it in her tea? Is it that hard to shake the can before drinking?

A hundred years ago, if someone had a glass of iced tea, they had tea, cold water, and sugar with maybe some mint or lemon thrown in for flavour. My daughter's can had 11 ingredients (including water) and six of them were not identifiable as food (mmm... calcium disodium edta anyone?). Even though it was lemon iced tea, there was no mention of lemon in the ingredient list.

The following day I was on a forum where someone asked for healthy meal ideas. One person offered a dessert suggestion that consisted of a ready made pie crust, filled with instant pudding and topped with artificial whipped topping. That was when it hit me. We can go all day, eating food, and manage to eat nothing that isn't crammed full of additives and modified ingredients. And many people do. Why does a package of muffins contain xanthan gum and monoglycerides? Why is the milk in my cream cheese modified? How is it modified?


We move in just under a week. Right now our cupboards are almost empty and most of my cooking supplies have been packed. When I restock our fridge and cupboards in our new home, I am restocking with real foods. If I don't recognize an ingredient, that food is not coming into our house. If the ingredients are modified, same thing.

Right now, what I've been doing is finding recipes for the basic ingredients I usually buy ready made. Things like gravy mix and soup stock. I've also been reading ingredient lists at the grocery store. Next Friday I'll be picking up a paper wrapped package of cream cheese, for example, instead of a tub.

This is how I explained our upcoming diet change to my son. "Remember the time I was tired and didn't feel like chopping the potatoes for poutine and we just went out and bought a package of frozen fries? It was a bit quicker but it didn't taste as good as when we usually make it. Now, instead of using powdered gravy mix, I'm going to make my own and it'll taste even better."

I'm wracking my brains for a conclusion but am too tired. I got kept up last night by a bunch of kids skateboarding under my bedroom window. Then, when I tried to take a small nap this afternoon, people outside my building started operating a power washer, a jack hammer, and some piece of heavy machinery that alternated between ramming into something metal and backing up while beeping. Oh, and someone's car horn got stuck and was constantly honking. ALL AT ONCE! That nap didn't happen. My son's due home in 10 minutes. It's totally quiet now. So, in conclusion, here's a gratuitous shot of the teeny bit of the solar eclipse I saw this weekend (taken from a friend's van window)...

Yummy vegetable frittatas

What a day! I woke to the alarm this morning and my cat Blackie tried to pin me in bed when I went to get up. Unfortunately for her she only weighs about 8lbs so it wasn't hard to move her. As soon as I got out of bed, she rolled right into the warm spot and stretched. I swear she snickered too (I'd never heard a cat snicker before).

I weighed myself this morning and was disappointed to see the scale back at 175lbs. Since I was at 172lbs yesterday I doubt it's a real gain but I'd been hoping to see a bit of a loss, especially after the hour long exercise class I had yesterday. Weirdly enough I weighed myself after exercising with the My Fitness Coach and was at 176lbs! Apparently I gained a pound while exercising... even though I didn't eat or drink anything. I only worked out for 15 minutes this morning so highly doubt I gained a pound of muscle. It's tempting to blame exercise for weight gain, except I have to be honest with myself and admit I didn't lose weight when I wasn't exercising. Maybe it's just me; I attract calories through the air.

I got to work and just felt fumble-fingered. I brewed coffee (without a pot), knocked over coffee cups (full of cream and sugar), and thankfully no one was around when I attempted to throw garbage bags into the bin out back (I did get them in... eventually).

And my throat started hurting a half-hour into my eight and a half hour shift.

There was a good part to my shift (other than getting paid) and that was the yummy vegetable frittata I made for lunch. I struggle with lunchtime; we get two 15 minute breaks and I find it extremely hard to eat a meal in 15 minutes. I'm just not a fast eater. Then I saw this recipe on SparkPeople and decided to try it... with a few modifications. It turned out incredible! And now I'll share my modifications with you :o)

Mini Vegetable Frittatas

Ingredients

1 1/4 cups egg whites (a carton and a bit)
2 Tbsp low-fat milk
1 cup diced tomato
2 tbsp grated light feta cheese
1 tsp pureed garlic
2 cups chopped mixed veggies (I used mushrooms, onion, fresh baby
spinach and julienne sun-dried tomatoes... not oil packed)
dried dill and Mrs Dash seasonings to taste



Directions
Mix eggs and milk in a bowl. Add cheese and chopped vegetables. Season.
Spoon mixture into muffin tins coated with cooking spray.
Baked at 350 degrees for about 30 minutes or until "set" and golden on top.

You can refrigerate and reheat these in the microwave for a quick breakfast or snack. Microwave on high for approximately 30 seconds. Serve warm.

I froze the frittatas and took one out last night to thaw. I only microwaved it for 20 seconds but our work microwave heats fast. Quick, easy, and it filled me up (along with a salad, vegetable juice, and four squares of dark chocolate). Best of all I finished lunch with several minutes to spare. I'm often shoving several forkfuls of salad into my mouth as the alarm on my cellphone goes off.

I'm home from work now and have wild and exciting plans for tonight that revolve around eating leftovers and reading while having a bubble bath. Even more exciting I plan on being dosed up on cold medication and in bed by 8:30pm. Blackie's already waiting for me.

Everyone deserves respect... including me...

I admit I haven't done a poll but I have a feeling I'm not the only one in the "holy crap stop putting yourself last" boat. I buy food that tastes "meh" because the kids like it, stay up later than I wanted because someone wants to talk, and my room is decorated with whatever I could afford after buying stuff for the kids. I've struggled for years to carve some time out for myself, now I'm pushing for a little more.

This year my main treat for me is redecorating my bedroom. This is what I've done so far...

One of the first things I did this week is buy new curtains. My old curtains were floral sheers my Mom made a decade ago. I loved the curtains but they were a decade old and the blinds under them were almost as old and torn. I also picked up a new lamp (my previous lamp was fake brass with a beige shade... chosen because it was the cheapest lamp I liked). Yesterday I went out and bought storage baskets to put my files in and got rid of the ugly beige filing cabinet that used to be where the chair is now and got a smaller chocolate brown mat to go beside my bed (replacing a larger floral mat). My cat Oreo seems to think I bought the mat for him, he loves it. Eventually, when it's warmer out, I'll paint and will slowly work on art for the walls. I'm thinking of framing my own photos for the walls... pictures like this one I took today...

Today's been a wonderful day. I didn't work today so I got to sleep in. Sleeping in these days means I didn't get up until almost to 8am, but no alarm woke me and I got to lie in bed and relax until my stomach urged me out. Then I went on a walk with my Mom, sister, and youngest nephew (that's when I took the above picture). I went home and made pancakes for lunch. Don't tell my son but they were healthy pancakes, stuffed full of ground flax, natural peanut butter, and low fat yogourt. He devoured them. I had two, topped with a lot of thawed frozen fruit, a bit of syrup and a teaspoon of ground cinnamon.

After lunch my Mom, sister, daughter and I all went out to get our nails done (thanks to my Dad who got us the certificates for Christmas). I don't work tomorrow either (woo hoo... two days off in a row) so I got my nails painted too. I can't wear nail polish at work and will have to wash it off tomorrow evening. But for now my nails are blue-green and very glittery.

We all went back to my parents' house and had Chinese take-out. I was diet conscious and ordered vegetarian hot and sour soup to start then had one spring roll (as a treat) with mixed vegetables and almonds and steamed rice. My Dad and oldest nephew baked a cake yesterday so I had a small slice for dessert (also as a treat).

I'm still working on my diet journal. This is my last fully completed page (the one I started today obviously has only one picture). I've managed a picture each day and, even better, lost two pounds this week and two pounds last week. I'm back down to my 40lb loss... weighing 172lbs now from a weight of 212lbs on January 1st 2009. I'm looking forward to seeing how well I do for the rest of the month!

My diet

All you need to do is open a magazine this month and you'll find the latest diet. It jumps out screaming "try me" and shakes you by the collar. I'm not following any of them. My philosophy is simple. We know what things are healthier than others. Fruit and vegetables, whole grains, nuts, and seeds. I'm not vegan so I'm also eating low fat milk products and sparing amounts of free range eggs. I'm getting my fats from hemp oil (tastes nasty on it's own but good in salad dressing), ground flax, and nuts. Of course I'm not just sitting at home nibbling on a handful of seeds and a couple of carrots. Life's too short for boring food. I'm eating things like homemade pumpkin-orange muffins with pecans, chickpea curry, vegetable lentil stew, and high fibre pasta topped with roasted vegetable sauce (and a couple of shavings of fresh Parmesan). Every day at work I get staff checking out what I'm eating because "it all looks so good".

I'm working on portion control as well. My dinner plates are huge so I've been using the so-called side plates instead. And I'm not eating after dinner. I'm making sure I get some exercise every day as well. The My Fitness Coach program (on the Wii) goes on every morning right after I get up. I find it makes a difference for work too. I'm more alert and flexible on the days I exercise. Of course I'm going to the Y to exercise as well.

I went to iThai with my parents today and thought hard about what I was going to eat. I love their golden curry; it's so good I joke they must put crack in it. But it's not really a healthy choice. I ordered appetizers for lunch instead, a mango salad followed by a bowl of hot and sour soup. Followed by an orange for dessert when I got home. It was just as tasty and I didn't leave feeling overly stuffed. Of course I'll have their golden curry again, but it will be a rare treat, not a monthly occurrence.

I only just started this diet last week so don't have any long term information but, so far I've dropped four pounds and am optimistic I'll break my year long plateau and finally get under the 170lb mark for longer than a single day while sick.

Another good day...

Every morning I stand at work and look out the windows at the trees and the sunshine and think "I wish I was out walking in the woods". Today I woke up just before 7am and decided today would be the day. I was outside, waiting for the bus, just after 8am. The trail I walk is not really "woods". It's right off a minor highway and I could hear the traffic on the 401 (a major highway) for the entire walk. Plus there's subdivisions on both sides of the trail, hidden behind the trees. But it feels like the woods when I'm walking and that's enough for me. It was chilly this morning and the grass and leaves were trimmed with frost. The brisk walk kept me warm, even though I stopped to take a few pictures.

I decided to go out to our favourite restaurant for lunch today. They have an amazing lunch special and I order the same meal every time. A bowl of vegetarian hot and sour soup for the appetizer and vegetable golden curry with rice and two vegetable spring rolls. I thought about lunch today. I love the hot and sour soup and it's a healthy choice. The spring rolls and curry, not so much (as much as I love them too). Today I ordered the appetizer mango salad with a larger bowl of curry. It was just as good and I didn't leave feeling overly stuffed (like usual).

After lunch we went to the mall. Often, when we're at the mall, we pick up a treat. Last time we went to Cinnabon for a minibon and a container of icing. According to the information I found online, the minibon is 300 calories (not including the extra tub of icing). I went to Purdys instead and picked up a 100 calorie chocolate peanut butter bar.

My other treat was a trip to Teaopia for a tin of chocolate mint rooibos tea. If you click on the link it leads you to the tea and to the nifty little tin I got to hold it in. That's what I'm sipping on now as a before bed treat.

I've spent a lot of my adult life making excuses for needing treats. I worked hard and deserve a cinnabon. It's been a stressful day and curry from iThai would be the perfect way to relax. All those *treats* ended up with me being 72lbs overweight... and that wasn't a treat. I worked hard at changing those habits and managed to lose 40lbs. But then I sat on a plateau for a year... struggling with the *treat* mentality and regained 10lbs this fall. Now I'm determined to change my views on treats. Treats shouldn't shorten my life. Treats shouldn't weaken me. And every day I'm going to continue to push myself to treat myself better. Today I succeeded. Now I need to work on tomorrow.